Oh, Mew, Mew!
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Oh, Mew, Mew! |
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To the tune of "Tit-Willow" from The Mikado, by Gilbert & Sullivan
On a chair by my desk
sat a Little Gray Cat
Going “mew, mew, oh mew, mew
oh mew, mew!”
I’d not seen a student
who ever did that
Going “mew, mew, oh mew, mew
oh mew, mew!”
For someone who earned a new certificate
she certainly seemed a
most distressed Gray Cat.
But I thought her a good Ph-
D candidate.
She went “mew, mew, oh mew, mew
oh mew, mew!”
So I said to her, “Gray Cat,
you look so distraught!
Going ‘mew, mew, oh mew, mew
oh mew, mew!’
You certainly seem to be
mewing a lot
Going ‘mew, mew, oh mew, mew
oh mew, mew!’”
She looked at me gravely,
and then did opine,
“I'm bored, and I need a new
passion to find!
Else I'll start climbing walls
and go out of my mind!
Oh mew, mew, oh mew, mew
oh mew, mew!”
So I said to her “Gray Cat,
archives are for you
No more ‘mew, mew, oh mew, mew
oh mew, mew!’
You’re clever and will see
the whole program through,
So don’t ‘mew, mew, oh mew, mew
oh mew, mew!’”
She gave it some thought, then said
“I will sure try!
The subject’s delightful
and you do know why.
But it won't stop me thinking
‘what a dumb cat am I!’
I’ll go ‘mew, mew, oh mew, mew
oh mew, mew!’”
So I said to her “Gray Cat,
you must teach a course.”
She went “mew, mew, oh mew, mew
oh mew, mew!”
“Take students and give them
your knowledge by force!
and don’t ‘mew, mew, oh mew, mew
oh mew, mew!’
For if you go on and
get your Ph.D.
you take on a responsi-
bility
To train our replacements
as others trained we.
They will mew, mew, to you, too,
but go do!”
I can tell you as sure
just as sure as my name
Isn’t “mew, mew, oh mew, mew
oh mew, mew!”
That Cat will bring to
our department much fame!
Ignore “mew, mew, oh mew, mew
oh mew, mew!”
That Clever Gray Cat, now
a Doctor became
Her protests of dumbness
were always quite lame
But still she repeats this
lament just the same
“Oh mew, mew, oh mew, mew
oh mew, mew!”
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